Everyday is a gift

After a long time, I watched 3 Indian romantic movies in a row with a kind of vengeful appetite. The first one was "Pokkisham", a Tamil movie by Cheran (starring himself and Padmapriya). Though the movie at times tested my patience, a melodious song "Nila, en Vaanam, Kaatru, Isai..." still reveberates in my ears. I repeated that song for 5 or 6 times until I concluded "Love is what we live for".

The second one was "Cheeni Kum". I watched that movie for Tabu. Her character reminded me of the most romantic girl in my life. Sorry Bachchan fans, I started hating that guy's acting.

The third one - "Das vidaniya" is about the last 10 things a cancer patient does in his life, I started at around 1 AM, but could not stop it until the movie ended at around 3 in the morning. There were a few moments in between when I did not bother to control tears snailing down my cheek in the privacy of my room. It reminded me of my own death and the unknown number of days we all have in our life.

Today when I woke up, I thanked God remembering Jhumpa Lahiri's words from her novel Namesake, "Everyday since then has been a gift".

Late 30s syndrome

Late 30s is a difficult period in a man's life. From childhood, people were busy pursuing some short term goal or the other. For example, we kept ourselves busy to cross matriculation, get thru Entrance exams, to graduate, to get a job, to find love, to have kids.. then comes the late 30s when you suddenly realize that you have been going through some routine for sometime now, without a significant goal in the vicinity. And on top of it, if you are slogging at work day in and out, all of sudden you become philosophical.... "What life is this, and What am I living for?"

When rest of his old classmates are suffering from this "late 30s syndrome", Thambi Aliyan has found a unique way to stop people going philosophical. The free time he gets between scratching two itching patients, he uses his emails to scratch his old friends' old wounds (with subjects like, "ഒരു പുല്ലും നടക്കില്ല"). That brings old buddies like Kaimal Mash, Ponnangala, Jackichayan and others back to the smoking tree in Baby Beach, secret place in Kotta (Fort St Angelo), Favorite Sitting Place (in Kotta Maidan) and fight each other with all that adoloscent vigor.

Sometimes, I think, Thambi is a Master Genius. He could have made a great politician. That's what they do too. Replace real issues with emotional black mail of general public, like a bomb blast happening immediately after a massive bribery case.

But you know, I have made it a point that if Thambi does something, I will have to see things negative about it. That's why I relate innocent Thambi's unsuspecting act to that of a crooked politician. Hence, despite all of Thambi's emails, I sometimes tend to remain on my philosopher's stone rather than moving with him to the neighbourhood of old SMS.

"What is this life all about?", "What is wrong with Thambi and the society?", What can I do to change Thambi and the society?", "What is the big deal if I just live, I die and I am forgotten like billions before me?".

I am deep in thoughts at times, my wife thinks this is sheer laziness. She cribs I am sitting idle when she calls out for help in household chores. If I don't find an answer to my questions soon, I know, the only way to survive with family is to be like Thambi, acting like a teenager throughout my life. But my ego does not allow me to be like Thambi.... Thambi and I should be poles apart, no matter what!

HAPPINESS IS A VOYAGE...

We convince ourselves that life will be better once we are married, have a baby, then another.
Then we get frustrated because our children are not old enough, and that all will be well when they are older.
Then we are frustrated because they reach adolescence and we must deal with them. Surely we’ll be happier when they grow out of the teen years.
We tell ourselves our life will be better when our spouse gets his/her act together, when we have a nicer car, when we can take a vacation, when we finally retire.
The truth is that there is no better time to be happy than right now. If not, then when?
Your life will always be full of challenges. It is better to admit as much and to decide to be happy in spite of it all.
For the longest time, it seemed that life was about to start. Real life.
But there was always some obstacle along the way, an ordeal to get through, some work to be finished, some time to be given, a bill to be paid. Then life would start.
There isn’t any road to happiness.
Happiness IS the road. So, enjoy every moment.
Stop waiting for school to end, for a return to school, to lose ten pounds, to gain ten pounds, for work to begin, to get married, for Friday evening, for Sunday morning, waiting for a new car, for your mortgage to be paid off, for spring, for summer, for fall, for winter, for the first or the fifteenth of the month, for your song to be played on the radio, to die, to be reborn… before deciding to be happy.

Happiness is a VOYAGE, not a DESTINATION.
There is no better time to be happy than… NOW!
Live and enjoy the moment.(Author unknown)

Now, think and try to answer these questions:
1 – Name the 5 richest people in the world.
2 – Name the last 5 Miss Universe winners.
3 – Name the last 10 Nobel Prize winners.
4 – Name the last 10 winners of the Best Actor Oscar.

Can’t do it? Rather difficult, isn’t it?
Don’t worry, nobody remembers that.

Now answer these questions:
1 – Name 3 teachers who contributed to your education.
2 – Name 3 friends who helped you in your hour of need.
3 – Think of a few people who made you feel special.
4 – Name 5 people that you like to spend time with.

More manageable? It’s easier, isn’t it?
The people who mean something to your life are not rated “the best”, don’t have the most money, haven’t won the greatest prizes…
They are the ones who care about you, take care of you, those who, no matter what, stay close by.
Think about it for a moment. Life is very short!
And you, in which list are you? Don’t know?

Applause dies away!
Trophies gather dust!
Winners are soon forgotten.
Let me give you a hand.
You are not among the most “famous”, but among those to whom I remember to send this message…

Some time ago, at the Seattle Olympics, nine athletes, all mentally or physically challenged, were standing on the start line for the 100 m race.
The gun fired and the race began. Not everyone was running, but everyone wanted to participate and win.
They ran in threes, a boy tripped and fell, did a few somersaults and started crying. The other eight heard him crying.
They slowed down and looked behind them. They stopped and came back… All of them…
A girl with Down’s Syndrome sat down next to him, hugged him & asked, “Feeling better now?”
Then, all nine walked shoulder to shoulder to the finish line.
The whole crowd stood up and applauded.
And the applause lasted a very long time…

People who witnessed this still talk about it.
Why?
Because deep down inside us, we all know that the most important thing in life is much more than winning for ourselves.

The most important thing in this life is to help others to win.
Even if that means slowing down and changing our own race.

If we pass this message , perhaps we will succeed in changing our heart, perhaps someone else’s heart, as well…

“A candle loses nothing if it is used to light another one.”

MERRY CHRISTMAS & A HAPPY NEW YEAR

WISHING YOU ALL A MERRY CHRISTMAS & A HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!

Vidhyaabhyaasavum Kuttikalum

A group of boys 10 or 12 years of age recently came to my company. They wanted to know whether I would allow them to play computer games. While talking to them, I observed that (as you all know, my friend vazhipokkan turned day dreamer has already certified me as a keen observer right from my childhood) one among them (the leader) looked very familiar to me. I knew that I somehow know him, but there was no chance that I have ever met him before - I was sure that I am seeing him for the first time.

Although I have often found that asking about family members ("veettil aarokke undu?" - is a common way a typical achaayan attempts to befriend people) makes some people nervous (I dont know why) and prompts them to abruptly end further conversations, I just asked him about his family. When he told me his father's name, I understood why his small face seemed so familiar to me - his father and me shared the same neighborhood when we were children. We parted ways when we were around this boy's age - his family moved to some other place, and we never met after that. I anyway did not think it necessary to tell him that his father and me were childhood friends.

I don't have any games installed on my computers. Nor do I allow outsiders to access my computers. However, thinking about the boy's father, I thought it necessary to arrange one computer with some real games installed for him and his friends.

Before he started playing, he asked me :

"What is your charge for playing?"

"No Charge"

That was a surprise for him and his little friends. One of the boys said that his neighborhood cafe charges a fair amount just for playing games. Anyway they left after playing for some time.

The boys began to regularly visit me (as one of them exclaimed gleefully - its free!!). One day while they were playing, one of my programmers came to me and said :

"It is not a good practice to allow children to sit here and play games. They are spoiling the computers by not using it properly..."

Now, I knew very well that this person doesn't like, and simply can't stand the noise and confusion children create with their unpolished manners. While I was thinking of giving another isolated (and old) computer to the kids so that they can play while he can do his work without being disturbed, he said :

"Today is a class day. Yesterday too was not a holiday. Please ask them why they are here daily, instead of being at school."

It was only then that I remembered it was a school day and they should be sitting in their class rooms instead of sitting here and playing games. That thought had never crossed my mind before. He certainly has a point - I thought.

I later asked the leader :

"Why didn't you go to school today ?"

"Today is strike"

"And yesterday?"

"..........."

"And the day before yesterday?"

"..........."

Instead of answering my question, he twisted and turned slowly, with a "kallachiri" on his little face.

They were studying in a nearby school. Since they were not in their school uniforms, their parents too should be knowing that they were not attending classes - I thought.

Then I thought about his father and asked -

"Won't your father scold you if he knows that you don't go to school?"

"My father doesn't come home - since my mother doesn't care for him..."

I didn't quite understand what he said - may be he accepted his father's version instead of his mother's version as to why his father doesn't come home...

I knew that even if this boy's father had been looking after him, he would have never bothered to check whether he goes to school or not. He himself had never bothered to go to school after the 7th std. While he was studying at 7th std, he had put up a argument with his class teacher. When the class teacher asked him how he will live in future without studying properly, he yelled back -

"Saarinu oru maasam paniyeduthaal kittunna paisa ente uppaakku oru divasam kadalil poyaal kittum"

After that incident, he never went to any school.

-----------------------------------------------------------

Some flash back...

Location : My Home
Situation : I returned from school. I have my 8th Std progress card (I Term) with me.

What is your rank?
Me (Nervous, Frightened) : 3rd Rank.
What is the rank of Sooraj Sukumaran?
Me : 1st Rank
...and Sujith Ravindran?
Me : 2nd Rank
.....................................
.....................................
.....................................

I suppose that the dots explain everything. In the end, I decided to study hard and beat at least Sujith for the next term.

----------------------------------------------------------------

Location : St. Michaels AIBHS, 8th Std A Class Room, Namboodiri Sir declaring II Term Exam Results.

First Rank : Sooraj Sukumaran
Second Rank : Sony Antony
Third Rank : Sujeeth Ravindran

I remember Sujith crying uncontrollably. Some boys gathered around him. Just like the "aadhye parayande" incident, the "sahathaapa tharangam" was naturally in his favour. Some of the gathered boys asked -

"Eda nee enthinaa rank vaangaan poyathu? Checkan karayunnathu kandillee? Nee alle avane karayippichathu...?"

".........."

I decided one thing - that in future I will stop rank hunting. I gradually learned to ignore the angry looks of my parents (and developed a sort of resistance too). After that incident, I never bothered what my rank was - not even when Gokul and others later succeeded in overtaking me.

While I say this, I cannot help but think about our dear friend Sooraj Sukumaran whom nobody was able to beat from 1st to 10th (regarding studies and ranks).

I suppose he too stopped rank hunting while he was in the Pre Degree / Degree classes. I remember showing  him my answer sheet (on his request) for him to copy my diagram of step-up / step-down transformer, when I saw him sitting idle without writing anything on the answer paper. He had earlier (before entering the exam hall) told me that he didn't prepare a thing for the exam and had requested my help to somehow get thru the exam.

---------------------------------------------------------

I believe that the newer grading scheme is better than the older ranking system - especially when we remember the tactics parent (and schools) were employing at that time to make their wards rank holders (especially for the public exams) - and not to mention the tension each boy / girl had to go thru after each progress card entry.

Now looking back from this stage of our life, I think all of you will agree with me that getting top rank in itself is not a big thing. Of course there is no denying that as a child one should study well and get good marks. However, the big thing is learning how to succeed in life by learning how not to allow life to fail you. Succeeding in life (or at least not to allow life to fail you) requires much more skills and tactics than just studying and getting top ranks.

Once you come out of the caring and protective umbrella of your parents, and start facing the realities of life, you will soon realize that most of the time, success or failure of life depends on a multitude of factors - many of which are not in your control or even in your parents' control. Of course learning skills are definitely a factor - luck, money, God's grace, help of co-workers, getting into the good book of superiors, etc being some of the other factors which may (or may not) lead an individual to success or failure.

Instead of making children a "pusthaka puzhu" (book worm) or a mark/rank hunter, I think what is required is to try to some how put inside them the insight, wisdom and vision to succeed in life, while being able to successfully fit ourselves into the larger scheme of things, while gracefully accepting and adjusting to the rough brushes one may have with life, and while smartly avoiding the pitfalls of life. As I read in some magazine - "If there is a big rock that blocks your way it may be wiser that you take an alternate route instead of trying to break the rock by banging your head or chest against the rock repeatedly, which definitely is a useless exercise".

As "Sri Kochouseph Chittilappally" - the owner of Cochin based V-Guard Industries and associated businesses (Wonderlaa,Veegaland, et al - and one of the top tax payers in Kerala) once said to a gathering of MBA students - "Being successful means being able to lead a successful life with a peaceful mind in a healthy body".

Let us train our children to strive to become successful individuals. Let us pass on the lessons we learned the hard way in our life to them so that they are already warned of, and can avoid such situations which they may (or may not) have to face in their life, wherever possible.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

I was in a dilemma. These boys obviously are not fortunate enough to know what the caring and supporting umbrella of parents are like. I understood that education doesn't seem to be of much importance to them - life itself is their educator. Should I allow them to continue their process of learning from life or should I stop them and send them to school? (the later of course being the popular demand among my staff).

One of my staff put it like this -

"Let the boys go and study. We should not support them skip classes by allowing them to come and play games. If you are so particular that you should allow them to play games (I could read his mind from his face - "Iyyaalkku ithu enthinte kedaanu...?"), let them come during holidays and vacations. This is their period in life in which they should acquire education."

I quoted my friend - the boy's father : "Saarinu oru maasam paniyeduthaal kittunna paisa ente uppaakku oru divasam kadalil poyaal kittum".

I genuinely doubted : "These boys are learning things from life instead of learning from any school. Which is better? After all, if an illiterate person without going to any school, can earn in one day what an educated teacher can toil and manage to earn in one month, which is better?"

My programmer interfered:

"It is your misunderstanding that money is everything. Of course money should be generated from one's activities for meeting one's expenses and savings too. Apart from that, a good society requires law conscious, law abiding, and educated citizens. Education is absolutely necessary to build a better society and improve the quality of our and others lives. I agree that life itself is the biggest educator. But learning from life and learning from educational institutions are things that should supplement each other - a school education will definitely enable them to understand things in a broader perspective."

I remember one of my friends (he is an advocate by profession) saying :

"Each and every citizen should know the law. If someone doesn't know the rules, anybody can easily cheat him. And if the person goes to an advocate or an authority to file a complaint against the person who cheated him - chances are there that the advocate (or the authorities) too (recognizing his ignorance) will cheat him. I am not saying that all advocates (and authorities) are like that - but some may be like that."

Another of my staff said -

"Absence of social (school) education makes children too much gullible. How can we blame our youth when they deviate towards criminal activities or gets misguided by crooked politicians who uses them as a tool to advance their mean purposes, when we have not even attempted to instill in them (thru social education), the moral values of modern society and the importance of life? We can see that a major portion of our anti-social activities come from the uneducated strata of our society. How can we blame them when they deviate towards terrorism thanks to an overdose of religious education (which is compulsory and which they do not and cannot skip), supplemented by the complete absence of social education?"

I conceded defeat. What they say is correct - there is no point in arguing with them.

Though the boys were not happy about me abruptly stopping their gaming activities, they were somewhat happy when I said that they may come on holidays if they want. And I found my staff too happy with my decision of keeping away the "vaanara sena". Though there is no guarantee that they will go to school, I too felt happy that atleast I have done my part of not supporting them in their class skipping activities.

UNFRIEND!!

"Unfriend" has been named the word of the year by the New Oxford American Dictionary, chosen from a list of finalists with a tech-savvy bent.

Unfriend was defined as a verb that means to remove someone as a "friend" on a social networking site such as Facebook.

"It has both currency and potential longevity," said Christine Lindberg, senior lexicographer for Oxford's U.S. dictionary program, in a statement.

"In the online social networking context, its meaning is understood, so its adoption as a modern verb form makes this an interesting choice for Word of the Year."

Other words deemed finalists for 2009 by the dictionary's publisher, Britain's Oxford University Press, came from other technological trends, the economy, and political and current affairs.

In technology, there was "hashtag," which is the hash sign added to a word or phrase that lets Twitter users search for tweets similarly tagged; "intexticated" for when people are distracted by texting while driving, and "sexting," which is the sending of sexually explicit SMSes and pictures by cellphone.

Finalists from the economy included "freemium," meaning a business model in which some basic services are provided for free, and "funemployed," referring to people taking advantage of newly unemployed status to have fun or pursue other interests.

In the political and current affairs section, finalists included "birther," meaning conspiracy theorists challenging President Barack Obama's U.S. birth certificate, and "choice mom," a person who chooses to be a single mother.

Novelty words making the shortlist were "deleb," meaning a dead celebrity, and "tramp stamp," referring to a tattoo on the lower back, usually on a woman.

(Writing by Belinda Goldsmith, Editing by Miral Fahmy, NEW YORK (Reuters Life!)

Ratan TATA

A. Terrorist entry
1. They entered from the Leopold Colaba hotel entrance and also from the northern entrance – spraying indiscriminate bullets on the Taj security personnel and guests in general.

2. Though Taj had a reasonable security – they were surely not equipped to deal with terrorists who were spraying 6 bullets per trigger.

3. The strategy of the terrorists was to throw chunks of RDX in an open area that will explode and burn – creating chaos so that the guests and staff run helter skelter so that the terrorists could kill them. The idea was to create maximum casualties.

4. There were several critical gatherings and functions happening in the hotel on that day – a Bohra wedding, global meet of Unilever CEOs and Board members and 2 other corporate meetings were being held in the hotel – besides the usual crowd.

5. The firing and chaos began at about 8.30 p.m. and the staff including employees on casual and contract basis displayed exemplary presence of mind, courage and sacrifice to protect the guests who were in various halls and conference rooms.



B. Stories of Staff Heroics



1. A young lady guest relation executive with the HLL gathering stopped any of the members going out and volunteered 3 times to go out and get stuff such as ice cubes for whiskey of the guests when the situation outside the hall was very explosives and she could have been easily the target of the bullets

2. Thomas George a captain escorted 54 guests from a backdoor staircase and when he was going down last he was shot by the terrorists

3. There were 500 emails from various guests narrating heroics of the staff and thanking them for saving their lives

4. In a subsequent function, Ratan Tata broke down in full public view and sobbed saying – “the company belongs to these people”. The wife of Thomas George who laid his life saving others said, she and the kids were proud of the man and that she did not know that for 25 years she lived with a man who was so courageous and brave

5. The episode happened on 26th November, a significant part of the hotel was burnt down and destroyed – the hotel was re-opened on 21st December and all the employees of the hotel were paraded in front of the guests

6. It was clearly a saga of extra-ordinary heroics by ordinary people for their organisation and in a way for their country. The sense of duty and service was unprecedented

7. The young lady who protected and looked after the HLL guests was a management trainee and we often speak of juniority and seniority in the organisation. She had no instructions from any supervisor to do what she did

a. She took just 3 minutes to rescue the entire team through the kitchen

b. Cars were organised outside the hotel as per seniority of the members

c. In the peak of the crisis, she stepped out and got the right wine glass for the guest

8. People who exhibited courage included janitors, waiters, directors, artisans and captains – all level of people



C. The Tata Gesture

1. All category of employees including those who had completed even 1 day as casuals were treated on duty during the time the hotel was closed

2. Relief and assistance to all those who were injured and killed

3. The relief and assistance was extended to all those who died at the railway station, surroundings including the “Pav-Bhaji” vendor and the pan shop owners

4. During the time the hotel was closed, the salaries were sent my money order

5. A psychiatric cell was established in collaboration with Tata Institute of Social Sciences to counsel those who needed such help

6. The thoughts and anxieties going on people’s mind was constantly tracked and where needed psychological help provided

7. Employee outreach centers were opened where all help, food, water, sanitation, first aid and counseling was provided. 1600 employees were covered by this facility

8. Every employee was assigned to one mentor and it was that person’s responsibility to act as a “single window” clearance for any help that the person required

9. Ratan Tata personally visited the families of all the 80 employees who in some manner – either through injury or getting killed – were affected.

10. The dependents of the employees were flown from outside Mumbai to Mumbai and taken care off in terms of ensuring mental assurance and peace. They were all accommodated in Hotel President for 3 weeks

11. Ratan Tata himself asked the families and dependents – as to what they wanted him to do.

12. In a record time of 20 days, a new trust was created by the Tatas for the purpose of relief of employees.

13. What is unique is that even the other people, the railway employees, the police staff, the pedestrians who had nothing to do with Tatas were covered by compensation. Each one of them was provided subsistence allowance of Rs. 10K per month for all these people for 6 months.

14. A 4 year old granddaughter of a vendor got 4 bullets in her and only one was removed in the Government hospital. She was taken to Bombay hospital and several lacs were spent by the Tatas on her to fully recover her

15. New hand carts were provided to several vendors who lost their carts

16. Tata will take responsibility of life education of 46 children of the victims of the terror

17. This was the most trying period in the life of the organisation. Senior managers including Ratan Tata were visiting funeral to funeral over the 3 days that were most horrible

18. The settlement for every deceased member ranged from Rs. 36 to 85 lacs in addition to the following benefits:

a. Full last salary for life for the family and dependents

b. Complete responsibility of education of children and dependents – anywhere in the world

c. Full Medical facility for the whole family and dependents for rest of their life

d. All loans and advances were waived off – irrespective of the amount

e. Counselor for life for each person



D. Epilogue

1. How was such passion created among the employees? How and why did they behave the way they did?

2. The organisation is clear that it is not something that someone can take credit for. It is not some training and development that created such behaviour. If someone suggests that – everyone laughs

3. It has to do with the DNA of the organisation, with the way Tata culture exists and above all with the situation that prevailed that time. The organisation has always been telling that customers and guests are #1 priority

4. The hotel business was started by Jamshedji Tata when he was insulted in one of the British hotels and not allowed to stay there.

5. He created several institutions which later became icons of progress, culture and modernity. IISc is one such institute. He was told by the rulers that time that he can acquire land for IISc to the extent he could fence the same. He could afford fencing only 400 acres.

6. When the HR function hesitatingly made a very rich proposal to Ratan – he said – do you think we are doing enough?

7. The whole approach was that the organisation would spend several hundred crore in re-building the property – why not spend equally on the employees who gave their life?

The Malayali..

The Double Life Of Bobby, Baby, Blossom, Biju And Shaji
Lost causes, alcoholism, eve-teasing, world politics, parochialism. Is there no end to the contradictions in the Malayali male, asks NISHA SUSAN


IN A COUNTRY as diverse as ours, communities survive on stereotypes of the ‘other’. It’s a way of classifying and ordering an otherwise anarchic world. In this wealth of comforting pre-judgments, the vein of Malayali stereotypes is particularly golden, replete with two-line jokes and an accent everyone imagines they can imitate. Scratch an Indian lightly and there will quickly emerge the stereotypes of the Malayali drunk, the Malayali letch, the Malayali trade unionist, the Malayali movie star or bureaucrat. “To get my work done, I had to run from Pillai to post,” grins a quiet Bengali about a government office expedition. Here come the clowns. Let the jokes begin.

One frequenter of online dating sites says he never tells a woman he’s Malayali until he’s absolutely sure of her affection
The world of the Malayali man is one where everyone seems to read and the sense of entitlement is so strong it can skew national statistical surveys. (Journalist P Sainath once compared the attitude of the starving Uttar Pradesh farmer — who responds to survey queries with gratitude for what he has — to the relatively prosperous Kerala farmer who curses WTO regulations, the government and the state of agriculture in the South Zone.) It is also a world of inexplicable quixoticism and seemingly lost causes. Kerala is a place where a public works department employee takes a year off to redesign preschool education for his village, and succeeds so well that 18 countries send their representatives to study the model.

Yet, seeking the typical Malayali man is a slippery affair. Each one looks out moodily and introspectively at you from behind varying amounts of facial hair. He’s sure he’s not typical, sure he’s misunderstood by his community. Simultaneously, he likes being Malayali and sure he’s the distilled Malayali, and others crude abominations.

If you are a shameless believer in the utility of stereotypes you would agree Malayali men are inclined to wanderlust, substance disorders and angst. Mallus do get around. The average Malayali in Tiruvalla, Tippasandra and Timbuktu sets forth blithely towards the furthest point he can imagine. The pursuit of Mammon doesn’t quite explain it. Other communities have sold ice-golas, pushed mutta-dosa carts and made their fortune not so far from home. But the Malayali man? A teashop owner in Leh, a temple keeper in Madhya Pradesh, an arms dealer in Washington, a doctor in Nigeria, a botany teacher in Papua New Guinea – when these Malayali men left home neither they nor their families asked why they had to go so far. Once there, the Malayali abandons his languid air in favour of a furious work ethic and labours to arrange visas for the cousins he barely spoke to at home. For a long while now the location of choice has been the Gulf, from where came infinitely expandable suitcases and infinite variations of a particular phenomena: men who see their wives and children once a year for a month, men who bring up their children in Kerala while their wives work abroad, men who have never known what it is to be parented so they don’t know how to bring up children. It’s fairly normal in Kerala to have a family where four generations have grown up without parents. Men’s relationships with their mothers is thus either distant or stunted: one barely knows what these gaps are doing to the social fabric of Kerala, except when you speculate why it’s the country’s suicide capital.


FOR MANY Malayali men in their 20s and 30s, a wide oeuvre of characters played by superstar Mohanlal and filmmaker Srinivasan (also classic sidekick and genius scriptwriter) represents Everyman. The definitive film in this lot is Naadodikattu (1987), where two young men, lazy and proud, can’t get white collar job in Kerala and, trying to get to Dubai, land up in Chennai. The hero needs to transcend not villains but his own self-destructive self. The Naadodikattu heroine, like others in this genre, is the minor but sensible counterpoint to the hero’s angst. She has a job and a well-ordered household and doesn’t worry about her place in the pecking order.

The Malayali man’s world is one where the most normal way of expressing romantic interest is the tepid sentence – ‘I like you’
As if this was too much of a good thing, in the late 1990s came a wave of movies written by Renji Panicker, with a word-gnashing macho hero who is simultaneously establishment and anarchist (the angry IAS officer, the furious journalist, the enraged cop). The heroine is just as repulsive – a caricature of the deracinated, urban ball-busting woman suitably tamed by the hero’s fusillade of verbiage and moustached masculinity. The shocking misogyny of Panicker’s films brings us to the most frequent cause of a Malayali man’s disavowal of his roots. Wrapped in many Malayali men’s hatred of their community is hostility towards women. One Malayali frequenter of online dating sites says he never tells a woman his identity until he’s absolutely sure of her affection. “They usually leap in shock and say, ‘If I’d known I wouldn’t have befriended you.’ It’s happened to me enough times. I don’t want them to think I’m predatory.”

Men and women relate to each other with some amount of discomfort everywhere in the world. But the thoughtful Malayali man finds himself in an embarrassing bind. He sees Malayali identity defined by disrespect and frank hostility towards women, by the horror stories narrated by Kerala women. This tempers the thinking man who otherwise would be prould to call himself a Malayali.

PEOPLE OUTSIDE Kerala, especially those taken in by the glamour of the state’s Human Development Index, find it difficult to believe that women have a difficult time here. In 2004, the Malayalam Manorama sent six women reporters into cities and district capitals across the state for six days to chart their safety in public spaces. The reporters’ diaries resemble mythical journeys into the Underworld as each woman writes about being groped, fondled and followed by multiple men.

While being felt up is a lively danger anywhere in public in Kerala, the real specialisation of the Malayali man on the strut is ‘comment-addi’ – a fine ear for dialogue, cinematic or otherwise, is turned into remarks on anatomy or character sharp enough to peel your skin off. Ratheesh Kumar teaches at IGNOU, Delhi, and becomes passionate when he talks of avoiding other Malayali men. “I can’t stand it when I’m stuck in the train with a bunch of Malayalis, seemingly middle-aged and respectable. They assume that I’d enjoy passing dirty remarks with them about the women out of earshot.”

The Malayali man at home is just as complicated a creature. The love story has rarely been central to Malayalam film plots. Between obscenity and near-meaningless poesy, Malayalam language doesn’t accommodate garden-variety love. The Malayali man’s world is one where the standard, most normal way of expressing romantic interest is the tepid sentence – ‘I like you.’

A Malayali activist says, ‘When we did the padayatra to Delhi we needed committee meetings before we agreed to cross the street’
J Devika, an academic at the Centre for Development Studies, Thiruvananthapuram, talks of how the combination of highly educated women and the thrall of consumerism has led to a particular kind of marriage in Kerala. No arranged marriage (and frequently even the ‘love marriage’) begins without the complex negotiation of dowry. Property acts as a stabilising third party in the marriage, where a professional man feels assured that it’s only his due to earn upward of Rs 20 lakh in dowry. “Couples are equally interested in pursuing consumerism and in creating children who are groomed for the global job market. The man is then happy to delegate most of the duties of controlling children to the wife. And he can be focussed on earning money.”


However, men still require their wives to maintain a highly controlled image of ‘decent’ femininity. This desired paragon being such an asexual object, it’s not surprising that Devika calls Kerala “God’s own country of adultery”. An elaborate system of deception is maintained so that the material comforts of marriage can be enjoyed alongside the disorienting pleasures of sex.

THE STEREOTYPE of the drinking Malayali man is more easily verified. Kerala’s per capita consumption of liquor is 8.3 litres per annum, the country’s highest. Men struggle with the morality of drinking – fluctuating between broad enjoyment and wanting it banned for its cyclonic devastation. Illicit hooch rejoices under names such as Yesu Christu (Jesus Christ) — drink it and rise after three days — or Manavati (The Bride) — drink it and have your head permanently lowered. Unlike the men huddled in cars swigging furtively in Haryana and Punjab, drinking is an everyday, public and communal all-male activity in Kerala – a venue for conversation and lavish spreads of food.

Anup Kutty, lead guitarist for the band Menwhopause, grew up in West Delhi and has a particular fondness for Mallu drinking banter. “In Delhi, people have small talk and gossip but very little other conversation. Anywhere in Kerala, you can sit down for a drink and ordinary people, even working class people, are talking politics, Kerala or South America. They are talking about cinema or some existential crisis.” Is this wishful self-description? Kutty’s description is hotly contested by other Malayali men, who say they can’t bear to be around these drinking conversations, which are an excuse for crude gossip about money and women.

‘The Malayali bureaucrat is overeducated and anarchic, and wants to control anarchy in other people,’ says Dilip Cherian
Kutty’s cheerful notion of an articulate working class is also strongly contested by others. The allegation states that, under the guise of democratisation, Kerala erases intellectual adventure and doesn’t allow individuals to sparkle. Ravi Shankar Etteth, Delhi-based cartoonist and journalist, says, “Why is it we have no heroes in Kerala since the 1950s? When the lumpen become the commissars of culture, it requires everyone to be the same.” Not just Etteth, almost every man you speak to will invoke the crabs-in-a-pot metaphor to illustrate destructive jealousies in Kerala. But, on the other hand, the Malayali man’s compulsive sense of egalitarianism is the stuff of satire too. A Malayali activist from the Narmada Bachao Andolan narrates the story of a padayatra to Delhi. “The groups from Maharashtra and Chhattisgarh agreed to go and that’s all they needed to know. With the Kerala group I was leading, I had to have a committee meeting before we agreed to cross the street.” Ramu Menon, a 29- year-old NGO consultant currently based in Ahmedabad, left Kerala years ago and relishes many of the stereotypes: “It’s true. There are no leaders in Kerala. Everyone is a leader in Kerala.” But nitpicking and self-righteous political disputes bring Kerala to a standstill and often fuel the already-healthy Malayali bellicosity.

The Malayali man is so relentlessly belligerent towards regulation that it is a truism that all seats of power in Kerala can expect to be continuously challenged. This tendency is, on the surface, contradictory to the growing power of Malayali bureaucrats. Prim, thin-lipped and precise, over the last couple of decades the Malayali phalanx has been on the way to replacing the UP cadre in collective influence. Image guru Dilip Cherian — one of our most influential Malayali men and perhaps the only one to ever be seen on Page 3, comments. “The Malayali bureaucrat is a result of three confluencing factors. They are overeducated, have a desire to flee Kerala and are anarchic. That means they are bright, mobile and have an overarching instinct to control anarchy in other people.”

Intellect and cynicism can be a tiring business. Perhaps it’s a reflection of Kerala’s longing to be no longer trapped in the mind that the energetic physicality and frank passions of Tamil cinema are hugely popular among Malayalis. This cinema is popular in a way different from the way North Indian culture is gaining ground in Kerala. It’s also reflected in the upwardly mobile avoiding Kerala’s bizarre naming practices in favour of Sanskritised names. Blogger Sidin Vadakut — a Malayali whose online reputation is founded on his self-deprecatory lad lit — once wrote about an imaginary Malayali stuck with an emasculating name: “Business is safe in the hands of the Mallu manager. After all, with a name like Blossom Babykutty he can’t use his Rs 30,000 salary anywhere. Blossom gave up on society when in school they automatically enrolled him for cookery classes. Yes, my dear reader, nomenclature is the first nail in a coffin of neglect and hormonal pandemonium. In a kinder world they would just… throw him off the balcony.


Where the rest of the country imagines Kerala’s education levels translate into a modern and liberal state, Malayali men complain that it’s yet a very narrow and stifling society. Gens, a 26-year-old lawyer in Pattanamthitta grew up in Kerala and went to law school in Kolkata before returning home. Like many others who returned, he’s bitter. Gens particularly hates the conformity of appearance that he says Kerala society requires of him. “You can’t even have a different hairstyle without being punished,” he says. Nevertheless, it’s difficult to discount the political imagination or culture capital of even the most deprived Malayali man, when compared to the rest of the country’s. A few summers ago, this writer spent a befuddled fortnight with a Malayali filmmaker travelling across Kerala. The entourage was composed of roaring drunks and intense, quiet men, but their tenderness was revealed in the way they carried the dying flame of Kerala’s Film Society Movement. Between two tiny towns in Wayanad there were enough strange sights for a lifetime: Kurosawa-loving adivasi girls (“my favourite is Rashomon”), auto drivers watching French films and a middle-aged rehabilitated sex worker looking forward to an upcoming screening of Krzysztof Kieslowski’s The Double Life of Veronique. And all because the small filmmaker and his friends, incoherent and drunk after sunset, spent their days carrying ethereal cinema and a heavy projector to villages.

IN CINEMA, in the distinctive parody culture, in literary fiction, in iconic comic strips, the Malayali man has always used understated irony (or crude wit) to cut the oily sheen of sincerity (women, on the other hand, are expected to be uniformly sober). “Malayalis in general have a tendency to fall into existential angst.

And humour obviously is the only antidote. Probably it neutralises sentimentality too,” says Baiju Parthan, one of the many Malayali artists who live in Mumbai (the canard being that they all live next door to each other in a Borivili colony called Immaculate Conception). From the 18th century poet Kunjan Nambiar to Channel V’s Lola Kutty, the Malayali wit has combined meanness with a silly grin. It’s part of the encompassing Malayali self-hatred that this wonderful trait, too, is looked at suspiciously.

Some years ago, a Mumbai filmmaker was in a tiny fishing village in north Kerala which was resisting the sand mining industry. The sandminers were carting away the estuary, one truckful at a time. At the heart of the film and the movement were the fishermen, who had set up a nursery to care for the eggs laid by turtles on their beach. The enterprise was all dashing beard and moonlit rescues, but the fishermen leading the movement stonewalled any attempt to deify them. At her wit’s end to understand the movement’s emotional landscape, the filmmaker asked, “When you’re in the boat at high sea, do you discuss romance?” Came the laconic, deadpan response, “Premathinapetti samsarkinnangil privacy vende? (To speak of love don’t you need privacy?)”

One can only seek romance in the Malayali man despite him.


From Tehelka Magazine, Vol 6, Issue 44, Dated November 07, 2009

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Sreemathi Teacher’s English

An email has been floating around for a while originated from some crappy Mallu brain. It comes with a ‘Youtube’ link showing Manorama News’ itchy clipping about our Hon: Minister of Health, Ms. Sreemathi Teacher’s speech in English.

Many half baked Mallu Sayipps lol’ed (Read, laughed out loud) after watching this video. Some were angry that she spoke Bilaathi language in poor taste. Some were ashamed: what if others, with whom we have boasted about our 100% literacy, hear this?

For a Mallu, it seems, the greatest achievement in education is to speak in English! unless a person speaks in proper English, he is no better than any ‘illiterate’.

This attitude remains wherever the Queen’s men physically subdued the natives. Thus in the Middle East, you see a lot of truck drivers, carpenters and janitors imported from Europe taking high offices. The moment they land in some King/Sheikh xxxx Airport, they throw away their cargo pants for Executive Suits; they leave behind their crampy London Apartments for luxurious villas by the sea. They get new visiting cards with designations such General Managers, Vice Presidents, etc.

And Mallu with his BCom and BA certificates (which are easily obtained from a printing press rather than toiling in universities) does all the ground work before the Sayipp could articulate those in his accent to make it “Professional”.

The sayipps might have left our land 60 years ago, but they still rule our minds. Our education really failed us. It is only useful in creating Mallus – egoistic hypocrites with slave mentality.

The world is no different – the more we read and the more we watch TV, the more we become slaves – slaves to selfish desires – increasing consumerism, rapes, poverty, oppression, hatred, violence, terrorism…

It’s time we stop gulping whatever is fed to us, we should rediscover the power of our minds… Let's debate over the content of Sreemathy Teacher's speech, not about the tool she uses to communicate.

You've got a mail !!!

At a time when forwarding of e-mails has become very common
among internet users, many users are unaware that they are at a high risk of
being caught in a legal tangle owing to the newly-inducted provisions in the
Information Technology Act.

As per the amendments which were notified last month, forwarding of
offensive e-mails as well as e-mails containing sexual contents would attract
jail term of between two to ten years and fine up to Rs 10 lakh.

As per Section 66 of the Act, sending of offensive content by means of a
computer or a communication device will attract provisions which are punishable.
Similarly, sending false information with the intention of causing annoyance,
inconvenience, danger, obstruction, insult, injury, criminal intimidation,
enmity, hatred or ill-will would face imprisonment of upto three years and fine.

Any mail send for the purpose of causing annoyance or inconvenience or to
deceive or mislead the addressee or recipient about the origin of such messages
would attract imprisonment.

Receiving a stolen computer or communication device with the knowledge that
it is stolen one will attract imprisonment of upto three years and fine of up to
Rs 1 lakh

Under Section 66(C), fraudulent use of the electronic signature, password
or any other unique identification feature of any other person, will face
imprisonment of upto three years and fine of upto Rs 1 lakh. Cheating by
personation using computer would attract three years’ imprisonment and fine of
upto Rs 1 lakh.

Capturing and sending of pictures of any person or `private area’ without
the person’s consent by violating his or her privacy shall be punishable with
imprisonment of upto three years or fine exceeding Rs 2 lakh.

Under Section 67, transmission of materials with sexually explicit
contents, including those pertaining to children, through computer would attract
imprisonment of five years and fine of Rs 10 lakh in case of first conviction.
In the event of second or subsequent conviction, it would be seven year
imprisonment and fine up to Rs 10 lakh.

__________________________________________________________________________________

Online edition of India's National
Newspaper
Monday, Nov 23,
2009

| Kerala - Thiruvananthapuram

Two youths arrested under IT Act

Staff Reporter

THIRUVANANTHAPURAM: The police have arrested two persons allegedly for making
changes to an e-mail carrying the photograph of a palatial mansion by adding a
caption stating that it belonged to Communist Party of India (Marxist) State
secretary Pinarayi Vijayan.
At a press conference here on Sunday, J. Sukumara Pillai, Deputy
Superintendent of Police, Cyber Police Station, said K.R. Manoj, 39, and
Karthik, 20, were arrested under the amended Section 66 A of the IT Act.
Manoj, of Bharanikavu, Kayamkulam, is a welding technician based in an
African country. Karthik, 20, a chartered accountancy student, is a resident of
East Gate, Ettumanoor, in Kottayam district.
Mr. Pillai said Manoj made additions to the mail received from one Dinesh
Nair based in Dubai and forwarded it to several mailing groups. The 20-year-old
Karthik also made additions to the mail and forwarded it to several people.
The mansion in the mail has been traced to Kunnamkulam in Thirssur district
and is owned by Pramosh, working in Saudi Arabia. Pramosh is the producer of a
television serial and some episodes of the serial were shot in the mansion.
The CPI(M) State secretary had taken up the issue with Director-General of
Police Jacob Punnose following information that the malicious mail was being
widely circulated. Mr. Punnose forwarded the complaint to the Cyber Police
Station.
Mr. Pillai said it was the first FIR registered by the station after the
amended Section 66A of the IT Act came into effect on October 27.

MALLOOS....and ADVERTISEMENT..

പരസ്യങ്ങള്‍ മാത്രമാണ് ഇന്നത്തെ ശരാശരി മലയാളി മനസ്സിന്‍റെ ചൂണ്ടു പലക. മേല്‍ പറഞ്ഞ തലവാചകവും മലയാളികളെ ആഴത്തില്‍ സ്വാധീനിച്ച ഒരു പരസ്യത്തിന്‍റെ അവസാന വാചകമാണ്. അതിന്‍റെ ആദ്യ വാചകങ്ങള്‍ മലയാളിമനസ്സിന് ഇന്ന് ഹൃദിസ്ഥമാണ്. ‘ഇപ്പോഴും ചെറുപ്പമാണെന്നാ വിചാരം’ എന്ന വാചകത്തില്‍ തുടങ്ങുന്ന ആ പരസ്യ വാചകമായിരുന്നു മുസ്‌ലി പവര്‍ എസ്‌ക്‌ട്രാ എന്ന ലൈംഗിക ഉത്തേജക മരുന്നിനെ മലയാളിയുടെ ദിവ്യ ഔഷധമാക്കിയത്.

കുന്നത്ത് ഫാര്‍മസ്യൂട്ടിക്കല്‍ ഉടമ കെ സി എബ്രഹാം എന്ന വ്യക്തിയെ ആഴ്ചകള്‍ക്ക് മുന്‍പുവരെ മലയാളിയുടെ ലൈംഗികശേഷി കൂട്ടാനായി അവതരിച്ച അവതാര പുരുഷനായി നിലനിര്‍ത്തിയതും ഈ പരസ്യവാചകം തന്നെ. ലൈംഗിക പീഡനങ്ങള്‍ക്കും ബലാത്സംഗക്കേസുകള്‍ക്കുമൊന്നും ഒരു പഞ്ഞവുമില്ലാത്ത നാട്ടില്‍ ലൈംഗിക ഉത്തേജനം വര്‍ധിപ്പിക്കുമെന്ന് പറഞ്ഞ് എന്ത് കടലപ്പിണ്ണാക്ക് കലക്കി കൊടുത്താലും വാങ്ങിക്കുടിക്കുമെന്ന് മനസ്സിലാക്കിയെടുത്തിടത്താണ് എബ്രഹാം എന്ന വ്യവസായിയുടെ വിജയം.

ലൈംഗിക പ്രശ്നങ്ങളുള്ള 30 ലക്ഷം പേരുണ്ടെന്ന് കണക്കാക്കുന്ന മലയാള നാട്ടില്‍ ഏകദേശം 5000 കോടി രൂപയാണ് ഒരു വര്‍ഷം ലൈംഗിക ഉത്തേജക മരുന്നുകള്‍ക്കായി ചെലവഴിക്കുന്നത്. നാട്ടില്‍ തുടങ്ങുന്ന ഏതു വ്യവസായത്തെയും സംശയ കണ്ണോടെ വീക്ഷിക്കുന്ന മലയാളി മനസ്സ് എബ്രഹാമിനെ തങ്ങളുടെ രക്ഷകനായാ‍ണ് കണ്ടതെന്ന് നാലു വര്‍ഷം കൊണ്ട് മുസ്‌ലി പവര്‍ നേടിയ വളര്‍ച്ച വ്യക്തമാക്കുന്നു.

കുറച്ചുവര്‍ഷങ്ങള്‍ക്ക് മുന്‍പുവരെ മാധ്യമങ്ങളില്‍ രണ്ട് കോളം വലിപ്പത്തില്‍ ‘ലൈംഗികശേഷി കൂട്ടാന്‍ നായ്ക്കുരണപരിപ്പ്’ എന്ന തലക്കെട്ടില്‍ വന്നിരുന്ന പരസ്യങ്ങള്‍ മുസ്‌ലി പവറിന്‍റെ വരവോടെ അപ്രത്യക്ഷമായി. പകരം മുസ്‌ലി പവറിന്‍റെ എട്ടു കോളം പരസ്യങ്ങള്‍ മാധ്യമങ്ങളില്‍ നിറഞ്ഞു. പരസ്യങ്ങളിലൂടെ എത് കോഴി കാഷ്ഠത്തെയും ദിവ്യ ഔഷധമാക്കാന്‍ കഴിയുമെന്ന് എബ്രഹാം മുസ്‌ലി പവറിന്‍റെ പരസ്യത്തിലൂടെ മലയാളിക്ക് കാണിച്ചുകൊടുത്തു.

ലൈംഗികതയോടും ലൈംഗിക പ്രശ്നങ്ങളോടുമുളള മലയാളിയുടെ സമീപനത്തിലെ പൊള്ളത്തരങ്ങള്‍ കൂടിയാണ് എബ്രഹാം നമുക്കുമുന്നില്‍ തുറന്നുവെച്ചത്. മുസ്‌ലി പവര്‍ പോലൊരു മരുന്ന് കഴിച്ച് ലൈംഗിക ശേഷി കൂടി എന്നു ചിലപ്പോള്‍ മലയാളി പറഞ്ഞേക്കാം. എന്നാലും തനിക്ക് ലൈംഗിക ശേഷികുറവുണ്ടെന്ന് തുറന്നു പറയാനോ അതിനായി മരുന്നു കഴിച്ചിട്ടും പ്രയോജനമില്ലെന്ന് വെളിപ്പെടുത്താനോ മലയാളി മനസ്സിലെ ഈഗോ സമ്മതിക്കില്ലെന്ന് എബ്രഹാം നല്ലപോലെ മനസ്സിലാക്കിയിട്ടുണ്ട്.

അതുകൊണ്ടു തന്നെയാണ് ഇതുവരെയും മുസ്‌ലി പവറിനെതിരെ ആരും ഒരക്ഷരവും മിണ്ടാതിരുന്നതും എബ്രഹാമിന്‍റെ കച്ചവടം പൊടിപൊടിച്ചതും. എല്ലാം തുറന്നുകാട്ടുന്നുവെന്ന് അവകാശപ്പെടുന്ന നമ്മുടെ മാധ്യമങ്ങളെ എങ്ങിനെ ചൂണ്ടുവിരലില്‍ നിര്‍ത്താമെന്നും എബ്രഹാം മലയാളിക്ക് വ്യക്തമാക്കി തന്നു.

2008 ജൂലൈ ഒമ്പതിന് ഹിന്ദു ദിനപത്രമായിരുന്നു മുസ്‌ലി പവറിനെതിരെ ആദ്യ വാര്‍ത്ത പ്രസിദ്ധീകരിച്ചത്. വിജയവാഡയില്‍ നടത്തിയ റെയ്ഡില്‍ മുസ്‌ലി പവര്‍ എക്സ്ട്രാ എന്ന ലൈംഗിക ഉത്തേജക മരുന്ന് ഡ്രഗ് കണ്ട്രോളര്‍ ഇന്‍സ്പെക്‌ടര്‍ റെയ്ഡ് ചെയ്തു പിടിച്ചു എന്നായിരുന്നു ആ വാര്‍ത്ത. വാ‍ര്‍ത്ത വന്നത് ഹിന്ദുവിലായതുകൊണ്ടും സംഭവം നടന്നത് വിജയവാഡയിലായതിനാലും നമ്മുടെ മാധ്യമങ്ങള്‍ സംഭവം അറിഞ്ഞില്ല. അല്ലെങ്കില്‍ അറിഞ്ഞ ഭാവം നടിച്ചില്ല.

അടുത്തിടെ മൂവാറ്റുപുഴയിലെ മുസ്‌ലി പവര്‍ നിര്‍മാണകേന്ദ്രത്തില്‍ ഡ്രഗ് കണ്ട്രോള്‍ ഇന്‍സ്പെക്‌ടര്‍ നടത്തിയ റെയ്ഡും മുഖ്യധാരാ മാധ്യമങ്ങള്‍ക്കൊന്നും വിഷമയമേ ആയില്ല. അല്ലെങ്കിലും അതൊന്നും വാര്‍ത്തയാക്കാന്‍ അവര്‍ക്കാവില്ല. കാരണം പരസ്യത്തിനു മേലേ വാര്‍ത്തയും പറക്കില്ലെന്നാണ് മാധ്യമ മുതലാളിമാര്‍ പറയുന്നത്.

കഴിഞ്ഞ വര്‍ഷത്തെ മുസ്‌ലി പവറിന്‍റെ വാര്‍ഷിക വിറ്റുവരവ് 23 കോടി ആയിരുന്നു. ഈ വര്‍ഷം 100 കോടി രൂപയാണ് ലക്‍ഷ്യം. അടുത്തവര്‍ഷം 1500 കോടി എന്നൊക്കെ വായനക്കാരെ അറിയിക്കാന്‍ വെണ്ടക്ക അക്ഷരത്തില്‍ അച്ചു നിരത്തിയവരാണ് ഈ മാധ്യമങ്ങള്‍ എന്നോര്‍ക്കണം.

എന്തായാലുമിപ്പോള്‍ മുസ്ലീ പവര്‍ പ്രതിക്കൂട്ടില്‍ കയറിക്കഴിഞ്ഞു. മരുന്നിനെതിരെ സര്‍ക്കാര്‍ നടപടികളും നടന്നുകൊണ്ടിരിക്കുന്നു. ഇത്രയൊക്കെ ആയാലും നാളെ വേറൊരു പേരില്‍ വേറൊരു വിദ്വാന്‍ പുതിയൊരു കബളിപ്പിക്കലുമായി അവതരിക്കും. എയ്‌ഡ്സിന് മരുന്നെന്ന് പറഞ്ഞ് കോടികള്‍ സമ്പാദിച്ച മജീദിനെപ്പോലെ. അവിടേക്കും ഒഴുകും ലക്ഷക്കണക്കിന് മലയാളിപ്പണം. കാരണം ഇതില്‍ നിന്നൊന്നും നമ്മളൊന്നും പഠിക്കില്ലെന്ന് ഇന്നാട്ടിലെ എബ്രഹാമിനും മജീദിനും സന്തോഷ് മാധവനുമെല്ലാം അസലായി അറിയാം!



Courtesy: Dr. K. T. ASHIQ

Thanks

Hi vidhu and fero..
Hearty thanks 4 the blog to enhance our good old memories that cherish our new mode of life....

Two choices..........

What would you do?....you make the choice. Don't look for a punch line, there isn't one. Read it anyway.

At a fundraising dinner for a school that serves children with learning disabilities, the father of one of the students delivered a speech that would never be forgotten by all who attended. After extolling the school and it's dedicated staff, he offered a question:
'When not interfered with by outside influences, everything nature does, is done with perfection.
Yet my son, Shay, cannot learn things as other children do. He cannot understand things as other children do.
Where is the natural order of things in my son?'
The audience was stilled by the query.
The father continued. 'I believe that when a child like Shay, who was mentally and physically disabled comes into the world, an opportunity to realize true human nature presents itself, and it comes in the way other people treat that child....'
Then he told the following story:
Shay and I had walked past a park where some boys Shay knew were playing baseball. Shay asked, 'Do you think they'll let me play?' I knew that most of the boys would not want someone like Shay on their team, but as a father I also understood that if my son were allowed to play, it would give him a much-needed sense of belonging and some confidence to be accepted by others in spite of his handicaps.
I approached one of the boys on the field and asked (not expecting much) if Shay could play. The boy looked around for guidance and said, 'We're losing by six runs and the game is in the eighth inning. I guess he can be on our team and we'll try to put him in to bat in the ninth inning.'
Shay struggled over to the team's bench and, with a broad smile, put on a team shirt. I watched with a small tear in my eye and warmth in my heart. The boys saw my joy at my son being accepted.
In the bottom of the eighth inning, Shay's team scored a few runs but was still behind by three.
In the top of the ninth inning, Shay put on a glove and played in the right field. Even though no hits came his way, he was obviously ecstatic just to be in the game and on the field, grinning from ear to ear as I waved to him from the stands.

In the bottom of the ninth inning, Shay's team scored again.
Now, with two outs and the bases loaded, the potential winning run was on base and Shay was scheduled to be next at bat.
At this juncture, do they let Shay bat and give away their chance to win the game?
Surprisingly, Shay was given the bat. Everyone knew that a hit was all but impossible because Shay didn't even know how to hold the bat properly, much less connect with the ball.
However, as Shay stepped up to the plate, the pitcher, recognizing that the other team was putting winning aside for this moment in Shay's life, moved in a few steps to lob the ball in softly so Shay could at least make contact.
The first pitch came and Shay swung clumsily and missed.
The pitcher again took a few steps forward to toss the ball softly towards Shay.
As the pitch came in, Shay swung at the ball and hit a slow ground ball right back to the pitcher.
The game would now be over.
The pitcher picked up the soft grounder and could have easily thrown the ball to the first baseman.
Shay would have been out and that would have been the end of the game.
Instead, the pitcher threw the ball right over the first baseman's head, out of reach of all team mates.
Everyone from the stands and both teams started yelling, 'Shay, run to first!
Run to first!'
Never in his life had Shay ever run that far, but he made it to first base.
He scampered down the baseline, wide-eyed and startled.
Everyone yelled, 'Run to second, run to second!'
Catching his breath, Shay awkwardly ran towards second, gleaming and struggling to make it to the base.
By the time Shay rounded towards second base, the right fielder had the ball. The smallest guy on their team who now had his first chance to be the hero for his team.
He could have thrown the ball to the second-baseman for the tag, but he understood the pitcher's intentions so he, too, intentionally threw the ball high and far over the third-baseman's head.
Shay ran toward third base deliriously as the runners ahead of him circled the bases toward home.
All were screaming, 'Shay, Shay, Shay, all the Way Shay'
Shay reached third base because the opposing shortstop ran to help him by turning him in the direction of third base, and shouted, 'Run to third!
Shay, run to third!'
As Shay rounded third, the boys from both teams, and the spectators, were on their feet screaming, 'Shay, run home! Run home!'
Shay ran to home, stepped on the plate, and was cheered as the hero who hit the grand slam and won the game for his team.

'That day', said the father softly with tears now rolling down his face, 'the boys from both teams helped bring a piece of true love and humanity into this world'.
Shay didn't make it to another summer. He died that winter, having never forgotten being the hero and making me so happy, and coming home and seeing his Mother tearfully embrace her little hero of the day!
____________________________________________________________________________________
A LITTLE FOOT NOTE TO THIS STORY:
We all send thousands of jokes through the e-mail without a second thought, but when it comes to sending messages about life choices, people hesitate.
The crude, vulgar, and often obscene pass freely through cyberspace, but public discussion about decency is too often suppressed in our schools and workplaces.
We all have thousands of opportunities every single day to help realize the 'natural order of things.'
So many seemingly trivial interactions between two people present us with a choice:
Do we pass along a little spark of love and humanity or do we pass up those opportunities and leave the world a little bit colder in the process?
A wise man once said every society is judged by how it treats it's least fortunate amongst them.

PARENTS ARE PRECIOUS!!

This was narrated by an IAF pilot at
a Seminar recently on Human Relations :
Venkatesh Balasubramaniam (who works for IIT) describes how his gesture of booking an air ticket for his father, his maiden
flight, brought forth a rush of emotions and made him (Venkatesh) realize that how much we all take for granted when it comes to our
parents.

My parents left for our native place on Thursday and we went to the airport to see them off. In fact, my father had never
traveled by air before, so I just took this opportunity to make him experience the same. In spite of being asked to book tickets by train, I got them tickets on Jet Airways. The moment I handed over the tickets
to him, he was surprised to see that I had booked them by air. The excitement was very apparent on his face, waiting for the time of
travel. Just like a school boy, he was preparing himself on that day and we all went to the airport, right from using the trolley for his luggage, the baggage check-in and asking for a window seat and waiting
restlessly for the security check-in to happen. He was thoroughly enjoying himself and I, too, was overcome with joy watching him
experience all these things.
As they were about to go in for the security check-in, he walked up to me with tears in his eyes and thanked me. He became very emotional and it was not as if I had done something great but the fact that this mean a great deal to him. When he said thanks, I told him there was no need to thank me. But later, thinking about the entire incident, I looked back at my life. As a child, how many dreams our parents have made come true. Without understanding the financial situation, we ask for cricket bats, dresses, toys, outings, etc. Irrespective of their affordability, they have catered to all our needs. Did we ever think about the sacrifices they had to make to accommodate many of our wishes? Did we ever say thanks for all that they have done for us? Same way, today when it comes to our children, we always think that we should put them in a good school. Regardless of the amount of donation, we will ensure that we will have to give the child the best, theme parks, toys, etc. But we tend to forget that our parents have sacrificed a lot for our sake to see us happy, so it is our responsibility to ensure that their dreams are realized and what they failed to see when they were young. It is ouo responsibility to ensure that they experience all those and their life is complete.
Many times, when my parents had asked me some questions, I have actually answered back without patience. When my daughter asks me something, I have been very polite in answering. Now I realize how they would have felt at those moments. Let us realize that old age is a second childhood and
just as we take care of our children, the same attention and same care needs to be given to our parents and elders. Rather than my dad saying thank you to me, I would want to say sorry for making him wait so long for this small dream. I do realize how much he has sacrificed for my sake and I will do my best to give the best possible attention to all their wishes.
Just because they are old does not mean that they will have to give up everything and keep sacrificing for their grandchildren also They have wishes, too.
Take care of your parents. THEY ARE PRECIOUS.


(Courtesy: AACHU Ashy)

Thekkanum Vadakkanum

I recently had to catch a motor rickshaw at 3 am in the morning, to reach my home from the Kannur Railway Station. You may be wondering what a motor rickshaw is.

I too till recently had thought it as a funny word when a frail, aged man (around 80-85 years) talked to me about it. What is he talking about - a motor rickshaw - funny old man - I thought. Though I tried very hard to hide my feelings about the man, he said - "I know that you are thinking funny about me. But for your information - the correct word is motor rickshaw. Motor rickshaw later became auto rickshaw, and later just auto."

To add insult to injury, he identified himself as Retd. (English) Professor in a famous University. I had nothing more to do than hide my shame (chammal) and frustration in the following words - "Ok Sir. What is the difference if you call it motor rickshaw or autorickshaw?". Saying this I left - but I learned a new word - and of course a new lesson too - never under-estimate anyone !!

Since it was dark and having nothing to do, I started a conversation with the auto driver. We talked about politics, weather... and after some time, he said:

"Your malayalam does not seem to be local. Where are you originally from?"

My friend who was with me interfered:

"Haven't you ever seen Malayalam Films? In almost all films atleast one "ACHAAYAN" kathaapaathram will be there..."

Now the talk began to center around achaayanmaar from central Kerala (Kochi) and South Kerala (Travancore) migrating to other parts of Kerala especially North Kerala (Malabar) around 50-60 years back (kudiyettam) - and about their families and their newer generations.

He seemed very skeptical about the idea of people migrating from one area to another.

"My ancestors were always in this place only. I too earn a living in this place only. What is the requirement to leave one place and go to another place?"

I thought - "How can I convince this person? How can I make this person understand?"

For a moment many things traveled thru my mind. Finally I thought - "Ok I will give him a lecture about the history of human migrations..."

"The history of human race has been that of migrations. Homo sapiens originated in some place in Africa some 200,000 or so years ago (as per generally accepted hypothesis) and migrated to different parts of the world to establish different cultures spanning the globe.

It will continue to do so - for a variety of reasons ranging from better food, shelter (etc in the older times) to better jobs, career prospects (in the modern day) and for whatsoever reasons (who knows) in the future.

It is the de facto modus operandi of all living beings including plants and trees, which while being unable to move from place to place, still employ various techniques to migrate their seeds and / or their genetic material to far away places."

While I was thinking about all these things and how to make a daring presentation so that he can understand it properly, my friend interfered:

"Why do you drive an auto? Is it manufactured in Kannur?"

"No"

"Ok. Why do you use Petrol to drive the Auto? Are Oil Rigs available in Kannur?"

"No"

"Your kids at home study with the help of electric bulbs. Are Electric Bulbs manufactured in Kannur? Does Kannur have any power plants manufacturing electricity?"

"No"

"Your wife uses kerosene. She uses cooking gas. Are these things manufactured in Kannur?"

"My wife doesn't use cooking gas. She uses kerosene any way".

"You use currency notes. Are currency notes printed in Kannur?"

"No"

"Your kids are vaccinated against diseases. Do you know of any company inventing vaccines in Kannur? Does Kannur have any companies manufacturing vaccines or medicines?"

"No"

"Each and every people living everywhere requires the help and support of other people living at far away places. Without items, goods, service, and support from other people from other places no body can live comfortably. Kannur has a lot of things - like textiles, tiles, etc. It is a give-and-take relationship with other places. That is the answer to your question."

"............................."

"Do you have some relative of yours in Gulf?"

"Yes."

"So if your relative in Kannur can go and live in some other place, earn money, and send it back, it is only natural that you should allow people from other places (including achaayaanmaar, and also people from any other place) to come and establish themselves here."

"............................."

"Achaayanmaar (or other communities) might have migrated here around 50-60 years (or less) back by legitimately buying property here. Your ancestors too has not sprout up from this place just like plants sprout up from the soil - they too certainly have migrated from some other place - may be 1000 years ago or even before that. The only thing that you can claim is that you have a seniority in migration."

"............................."

My jaws dropped. What a simple yet brilliant (and effective) explanation - something I always wanted to give - but unable to do till date. I couldn't help admiring my friend (for the first time - I should confess) for his practical wisdom and quick wit.  And I was thinking of lecturing about migration of homo sapiens from Africa...

I was also thinking about telling our "saarathi" some things related to "resource sharing" :

"All inventions and discoveries made by human race is actually available for all - for the common betterment of mankind - be it vaccines, technological innovations, and so on. It is collective effort of all human beings irrespective of cast, creed, ethnicity, culture, or one's religious or political affiliations, to improve the quality of life."

I had also thought about enlightening him with some Kerala history:

"Now regarding the history of Kerala, Kerala had been ruled by different rulers - and was split in the following line almost throughout written history - North Kerala (also called Malabar), Central Kerala, and South Kerala. Unified Kerala was formed by joining these three areas (all Malayalam speaking) on November 1, 1956. So we still sometimes call ourselves thekkan and vadakkan, and I do not know whether there is something called nadukkan :-) for people living in central Kerala."

But my (more practical) friend saved me my day (or night ?), by simply overtaking me. If I had tried to enlighten our driver with the history of African homosapiens, resource sharing or history management, I don't know what might have happened....

Love

Young lady, you ask me for my love,
And I tell you it's all yours.
But from that dry smile on your pale face,
I hear a deep sigh of loss;
That only an aching heart can make;
That only a burning heart will listen.

Young lady, I know, you ask me for my soul,
But I only give you my body.
I know, you need my soul to reach my body,
But I reach your soul through your body.
For my soul, you sacrifice your body
And for your body, I sacrifice my soul.

ROAD NOT TAKEN --------------------- Robert Frost

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;

Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim
Because it was grassy and wanted wear,
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,

And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I marked the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way
I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I,
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.

--ROBERT FROST

(Courtesy: Ashfaq)

Happy birthday, Kerala

Oh my beautiful land,
that lies between the endless mountain
and the endless sea,
like a narrow green strip
left over from a happy dream.

Oh my beautiful land,
with red muddy roads
along the slow streaming rivers,
impregnated by the tears of
the gloomy monsoon skies.

Oh my wretched land,
deserted by the children
for less green pastures;
to earn the wealth it takes
to turn you a barren land.

Oh my beloved land,
I wish you today,
From a distant land
with a distant taste,
a very happy birthday!

Loneliness

Remember, we tread this path many a night?
Night after night, we had tales to tell.
Tales about us, repeated hundreds of times.
But every time, we broke the stillness with our laughter
The nervous stillness of the gloomy earth,
Awaiting the golden kiss of its lover moon;
That tender touch which made every tip of grass
To rise up in delight like hairs on our skin.

Now, when I walk alone, I remember those nights.
And I wish I could laugh the way we did.
Or I wish there be a storm that blows out your thoughts from me
Like the desert storm that purges the past.
New dunes to be formed, and new footprints to emerge,
Burying the ones that it bore before.
Then I feel, despite the pain it gives, let your thoughts stay in me
For I become lonely, when even thoughts desert me…..

Adam and Eve

When my wife (sometimes) quarrel with me, I say this story to her as to why women quarrel with men frequently. I don't know whether you have already heard this story - any way let me share it with you.

According to The Bible, God created (the first woman) Eve from (the first man) Adam's ribs. Let us go back to the time when God created Man. God saw that Adam was feeling lonely - He felt that Adam requires a companion.

Now our story starts from here. God put Man (Adam) to sleep. He performed a surgery on Adam and took out one rib from him. He then stitched up Adam who was fast asleep. God decided that let Adam sleep for a while before he is woken up again.

As far as we all know, God used this particular rib to create Eve; however the actual events took place something like this:

It was a difficult surgery, and God found Himself exhausted. He called Gabriel (the Angel - is God's chief deputy), handed him the bone piece and asked him to take care of it till He returns from rest.

Gabriel waited there for a long time with the bone piece in one hand and watching the sleeping Adam. As time passed, and there was no sign of God, and he too felt sleepy. He gradually entered in to a slumber.

Enter Lucifer (the chief of Devils). He immediately estimated that whatever Gabriel is holding should be something very special (since Gabriel is very close to God). He snatched the bone piece from Gabriel and ran away.

Gabriel woke up from sleep and ran after Lucifer. After some running, Lucifer jumped into a small hole. By this time Gabriel had grabbed part of Lucifer's tail. Seeing that he had no other option, Lucifer escaped leaving part of his tail in Gabriel's hands.

Now Gabriel was in a fix. If he failed to return Adam's bone piece to God, he feared that God might turn him into another Lucifer (as had happened earlier with some of his colleagues). What was available with him was a bone piece from Lucifer's tail. When he heard God coming towards him, he quickly peeled off the skin from the tail piece...

...After some time God created Eve. He found that Adam was happy seeing his companion.

...and men and women happily (?) lived ever after.